#replace circuit breaker

[celtex-automation]

Emerging Technologies Transforming the Industrial Automation Sector in 2025

The industrial automation sector is thriving in 2025, with innovative technologies making factories smarter, safer, and more efficient. From advanced robotics to artificial intelligence, these advancements are helping businesses reduce costs and boost productivity.

Let’s explore the key technologies reshaping automation and what they mean for industries aiming to stay competitive.

Smart Robotics and Cobots

Collaborative robots, or cobots, are revolutionizing automation by working alongside humans, improving safety and flexibility. In 2025, cobots have evolved significantly, offering:

Smart sensors: Detect human movements to prevent accidents.

Easy programming: Allow workers to set them up without coding skills.

Versatile tasks: Manage tasks like assembly, packaging, and material transport.

Cobots make automation affordable, enabling smaller factories to streamline operations without large investments.

Artificial Intelligence for Efficiency

Artificial intelligence (AI) is transforming automation by enabling machines to learn and adapt. AI analyzes data to optimize processes, reducing errors and downtime. Key benefits include:

Predictive maintenance: Spots equipment issues before failures occur.

Quality control: Detects defects faster than human inspectors.

Energy optimization: Adjusts operations to save power.

AI is driving efficiency in industries like manufacturing and logistics, making processes smarter and more cost-effective.

IoT and Smart Connectivity

The Internet of Things (IoT) connects machines and sensors, creating smart factories. Similar to residential electrical upgrades that power smart homes, IoT in the industrial automation sector enables real-time data sharing. IoT benefits include:

Live monitoring: Tracks equipment performance instantly.

Workflow efficiency: Syncs production with supply chain needs.

Safety alerts: Warns of potential issues in real time.

At Celtex Electric & Automation, we provide electrical installations and automation solutions, like PLC programming and instrumentation, to support efficient industrial operations.

Upgrading Electrical Infrastructure

Automation relies on robust electrical systems. The new electrical panel cost ranges from $1,500 to $4,000, depending on capacity and wiring needs. Upgrading panels ensures factories support high-tech systems without power issues. Knowing when to replace circuit breaker components is critical, as outdated breakers can disrupt automation, causing costly downtime.

Green Automation for Sustainability

Sustainability is a priority in 2025, with automation driving eco-friendly practices. Green technologies include:

Efficient motors: Reduce energy use in automated systems.

Renewable integration: Support solar or wind power in operations.

Waste reduction: Optimize materials to minimize scrap.

These innovations help factories meet global sustainability goals while lowering costs.

The industrial automation sector is poised for growth, with AI, IoT, and green technologies creating smarter, more sustainable factories. At Celtex Electric & Automation, we’re dedicated to powering these advancements with expert electrical and automation services.

Ready to modernize your facility? Contact us for a free consultation and start building a more efficient future today!

[northwestofinsanity]

*Sees one of three light bulbs on the bathroom ceiling light go out the day after I fell off a ladder while fighting with the fluorescent tube light fixture on the kitchen ceiling* “Y’all… no. We’re not doing this tonight.”

[sseletrical]

Buy Federal Pacific Panels Online – SS Electrical Supply

Looking for high-quality Federal Pacific panels? SS Electrical Supply offers a wide selection of reliable circuit panels perfect for residential and commercial use. Enjoy competitive prices, fast shipping, and expert support for all your electrical needs.

[maryoma00]

HVAC Repair: The Ultimate Guide to Keeping Your System Running Efficiently

Heating, ventilation, and air conditioning (HVAC) systems are essential for maintaining indoor comfort in homes and commercial spaces. A properly functioning HVAC system regulates temperature, improves air quality, and ensures energy efficiency. However, like any mechanical system, HVAC units can develop issues over time.

Timely HVAC repairs are crucial to preventing costly breakdowns and extending the system’s lifespan. Ignoring minor issues can lead to major failures, skyrocketing energy bills, and even health hazards due to poor air quality. In this guide, we’ll explore common HVAC problems, troubleshooting tips, professional repair costs, and maintenance best practices.

2. Understanding HVAC Systems

Components of an HVAC System

An HVAC system comprises several key components that work together to regulate indoor temperature and air quality:

Thermostat: Controls the temperature settings and signals the system to heat or cool as needed.

Furnace: Heats the air during cold seasons.

Air Conditioner: Cools and dehumidifies the air.

Ductwork: Channels heated or cooled air throughout the building.

Vents and Registers: Distribute air evenly across rooms.

Air Filters: Remove dust, pollen, and other contaminants from the air.

How HVAC Systems Work

An HVAC system operates by cycling air through heating and cooling components before distributing it through ductwork and vents. The thermostat acts as the control center, signaling the system when adjustments are needed. Proper maintenance ensures smooth operation, but wear and tear over time can lead to malfunctions.

3. Signs Your HVAC System Needs Repair

Knowing the warning signs of HVAC problems can help you address issues before they become costly. Here are some common indicators:

Unusual Noises

Banging, clanking, or screeching noises can indicate loose or broken components.

Hissing sounds may suggest refrigerant leaks.

Clicking sounds might signal electrical issues.

Weak Airflow

Clogged air filters, duct obstructions, or a failing blower motor can reduce airflow.

Inconsistent airflow between rooms could indicate ductwork problems.

Strange Odors

Musty smells suggest mold or mildew in ducts.

Burning odors may indicate an overheating component or electrical issues.

Inconsistent Temperatures

If some rooms are too hot while others are too cold, the HVAC system may need recalibration.

A failing thermostat or blocked vents can cause temperature imbalances.

4. Common HVAC Problems and Their Causes

Dirty or Clogged Filters

Clogged filters restrict airflow, causing the system to work harder.

Regularly changing filters improves efficiency and air quality.

Thermostat Issues

Incorrect settings or faulty sensors can prevent the system from functioning properly.

Upgrading to a smart thermostat can enhance performance.

Refrigerant Leaks

Low refrigerant levels can cause the AC to blow warm air.

Leaks require professional repair and recharging.

Electrical and Wiring Problems

Faulty wiring can lead to system failures or fire hazards.

Regular inspections help prevent electrical malfunctions.

Frozen Evaporator Coils

Dirty coils or low refrigerant levels can cause ice buildup.

Turning off the unit and allowing it to thaw before calling a technician can prevent further damage.

5. DIY HVAC Troubleshooting Tips

Before calling an HVAC technician, you can perform some basic troubleshooting steps to identify minor issues:

Checking and Replacing Air Filters

Dirty filters are the most common cause of HVAC inefficiency.

Replace filters every 1-3 months for optimal performance.

Inspecting Thermostat Settings

Ensure the thermostat is set to the correct temperature mode.

If the thermostat is battery-operated, replace the batteries.

Cleaning Vents and Ducts

Dust buildup in vents can obstruct airflow.

Vacuum vents and consider professional duct cleaning if airflow remains weak.

Resetting Circuit Breakers

If the HVAC system won’t turn on, check the circuit breaker.

Resetting the breaker may restore power if there’s been an overload.

[jerseyshorehandyheroes]

Experiencing flickering lights or Replacing Circuit Breakers?

Experiencing flickering lights or Replacing Circuit Breakers? Jersey Shore Handy Heroes offers expert circuit breaker replacement services. Licensed & insured. Don't risk electrical fires! Jersey Shore Handy Heroes provides professional circuit breaker replacing. Get a free quote!

[furnacerepair7]

Top 10 Warning Signs Your Furnace Needs Repair

Furnace not working: Identifying and Addressing Complete Furnace Failures One of the most obvious signs that your furnace needs repair is if it stops working entirely. If you turn on your thermostat and nothing happens, or if the furnace starts but then quickly shuts off, there is likely a significant issue that needs to be addressed. Common causes include a malfunctioning thermostat, a broken…

[unicorn-argent]

I can't be a Ku.romi girly, I should have never read Ku.romi's wiki page, a character that holds grudges from tiny slights and mishaps for years and hates someone for it is the exact same shit that my sibling does to me

[topelectrician]

How to Repair a Circuit Breaker | Licensed Electrician Tips

One of the most common concerns surrounding circuit breakers revolves around the annoying flickering of lights or their complete absence during a blackout. These essential devices play a crucial role in protecting your electrical system by quickly identifying dangerous ground faults, excessive power usage, and sudden surges, thus preventing potential hazards throughout your home. Acting as vigilant protectors for your valuable equipment, circuit breakers step in by disconnecting electricity in case of malfunction, preventing potential damage to your wiring and appliances. This comprehensive guide is designed to help you create a peaceful and trouble-free electrical environment in your home, whether you need circuit breaker replacements or are considering such a task. To explore further insights in this blog, click the provided link to access a wealth of knowledge. Read More

[denverbreaker]

Federal Pacific Replacement Breakers

Denver Breaker is your trusted source for Federal Pacific replacement breakers. Our high-quality, reliable circuit breakers ensure safe and efficient electrical systems. Upgrade your panel with Denver Breaker's precision-engineered replacements, enhancing performance and eliminating the risks associated with outdated Federal Pacific breakers. Your safety is our priority. https://denverbreaker.com/product-category/circuit-breakers/

[jaggedamethyst]

not in that way (part one)

bucky barnes x fwb!reader

content: steve rogers is your best friend, which means that inherently bucky should be yours too. somewhere along the way, it became more than that for you. for bucky, it's just tolerance. he likes you, but not like that. not in that way.

warnings: 18+ minors dni, smut, protected sex (yeah wrap that up), rough, choking, fwb, mean bucky, mutual pining, not proofread

notes: thank you guys for the support on the snippet as well as for waiting for me as i got this done! i just finished finals so i plan on locking in on this one and circuit breaker bc i cannot stop thinking about them.

ps. i swear bucky and reader are friends, just had to hit the angst and give some background but there will be cute moments along with smut probably every chapter...I'm hoeing out.

series master list

。·:*:·ﾟ★,。·:*:·ﾟ☆　 。·:*:·ﾟ★,。·:*:·ﾟ☆

“Steve?” You called out to him, steps pounding behind you as you hurriedly moved toward his pinged location. “Steve, oh my god.” Your voice trailed off, shock evident. 

People brushed by you and pushed toward Steve’s figure on the ground. You’d never seen him like this. Sure, Steve Rogers was a super soldier and the most physically strong man you knew—but this was different. Mentally, he seemed destroyed. 

He called your phone, short of breath and muttering for help. It immediately sent you into action. You were normal—the most civilian anyone could be. There was no other option but to call someone, plead with them to find and help your friend. He’d been washed up on the shore, lying in the dirt and clearly out of it. 

You watched him get worked on, staring into the distance. 

“What happened?” You kneeled next to him,  “Who did this?” 

Steve turned to you, eyes glossed over in disbelief. “Bucky.” He shook his head, “It was Bucky.” He kept repeating it to himself, attempting to convince his own mind that it was true. “It was him. It was Bucky. He was here.” 

“I don’t understand,” you grasped his shoulder. “I thought he was gone—you saw.” You gulped, searching his face for any hesitance. “You said he fell, that he-“

“It was him.” 

“Okay.” You nodded, “Okay, I believe you. He was here.” 

It was true. The man you’d heard so many stories about had returned. He wasn’t like the anecdotes Steve recalled; this Bucky was darker, more quiet, resigned. 

He was an observer. You often caught him staring at you, eyes lingering between your figure and Steve’s. Bucky would always stand, tucked into a corner. He didn’t feel deserving of the warmth Steve offered—the humanity that remained present in you. There were times, then, that you would offer a welcoming hand. A slight wave of motion offered him a seat, acknowledging that he did deserve to be there. He felt human with you. 

That’s what initially drew Bucky to you and inevitably why you became friends, too. There was a way that you loved everyone, insisted on not leaving them out and nourished their insides. 

The hurt came when he realized it would never be that way for him.

You could never love him, not a monster. Not when the shining emblem of a perfect man sat beside you every day. Steve had so much time with you—he was your best friend. Bucky couldn’t replace him, not if he tried. So he always kept you at arms length, hoping to be more than friends but settling for something less. 

The first time it happened, when Bucky had been so lucky to have a moment with you—he swore that he was dreaming. He never gave you a reason to like him, in fact, it was the opposite. He’d gone out of his way every day to push you further from him, make it known that he’d never be as good as Steve. 

He could tell you saw something different; he hated it. 

The three of you had tried small talk often, Steve facilitating some sort of discussion to break the ice. It almost always ended with you and Bucky exactly where you started, friends who were forced to be so because of a mutual one.

“Well, I’m headed out—you two should talk.”

“Steve, no-“ 

“Buck, you two are my favorite people in the world. I would love it if you gave this a chance.” Steve patted his friend’s shoulder, “For me. Please.” 

Bucky turned to look at Steve, a solid expression on his face. He didn’t speak, just gave him a small nod and let Steve step around him and out of your place. 

It was common that Steve would find solace in your home. It was far from the city, neatly tucked away in a residential area. There was a sense of normalcy and he was proud to introduce that to Bucky—he needed that, deserved it after everything. 

The room was silent, violently so. You sat across from Bucky—him lingering in your peripheral, and you nestled softly into your couch. He didn’t move, standing still near a wall that offered him the sight of every possible window and exit. 

“Do you wanna sit?” 

You watched his body for any reaction, dissatisfied when there was none. It was awkward, him avoiding eye contact and you not sure of what else to say. 

You sighed. “I’ll be back.” You announced your departure, not that it mattered to him. 

You beeline to the bathroom, desperately needing to escape him. He was always like this, closed off and so obviously annoyed by your presence. Splashing your face with water did little to temper you, and your body seemed to overheat at the thought of having to see him again. 

You didn’t let yourself think—couldn’t. You stepped out and kept your head down before looking toward Bucky’s signature spot on the wall. He wasn’t there. 

You tilted your head down, seeing Bucky now sitting on the couch, two cushions away from where you’d been prior. He watched you smile softly, moving to sit in your spot.

Bucky made a habit of keeping his hands in his lap. He would sit stoically at all times. It was the same now. 

He avoided eye contact but muttered, “Hi.” 

Your breath hitched, surprised he’d started a conversation. Keeping your tone even so as not to overwhelm him, you replied, “Hi, Bucky.” 

The both of you nodded, letting the weight of your forced proximity surround you. As much as he tried, he couldn’t ignore you. The faint smell of your hair products, the way you tapped your own leg rhythmically, how nervous you were—he noticed it all. 

“Do you, um,” you swallowed. “Do you want something to drink, maybe?” 

It’d been over a year since Bucky had shown up. You, of course, shared small talk with him in that time. He’d grown to know the story of you and Steve—how you met. It would suffice to say that Bucky grew to be an acquaintance of yours—a long lost friend of a friend…one that would never truly like you. Accepting that was hard; you wanted Bucky to be comfortable at the very least. If not like you, he would at bare minimum be able to sit down for once. 

So today was a win. 

Bucky didn’t reply to your question but instead asked his own, “How was Steve? Without me, I mean?” 

His voice was gruff, and you hadn’t expected that question, let alone more than a single syllable from him. 

“Well,” you readjusted to face Bucky, “He’s always the most positive guy in the room—which I’m sure you know.”

Bucky let a smirk slip, recounting the optimism his friend had at all times. 

“He’s better than me that way, than a lot of us.” 

“I don’t think that’s true. He’s just Steve, you know that.” 

He didn’t know that. Bucky was living in his body but observing from outside his own mind. He was witnessing his friend after so much time had escaped him. Everything he thought was true wasn’t anymore. 

He wanted to get to know you, offer you the same grace that was given to him. But he couldn’t. Before it even begun, Bucky was overwhelmed. He pushed himself to be kinder, to do this for Steve. It was simply futile. 

He stood suddenly and looked down at you. “I should go.” 

“Okay,” you stood, nodding. “I guess I’ll be seeing you.” 

He hummed, rolling his shoulders back and tightening his posture again. He didn’t respond. 

“I’ll tell Steve you tried today,” you whispered to him. “I know he’ll appreciate it. I do.” 

The tension was palpable. Your eyes stayed locked on each other until you heard a sound and looked down. The mechanical whirring of his metal arm was clear, only slightly suppressed by the gloves he always wore. He watched you noticing his hand twitch as if he wanted to move it. There was a restraint there, like he was pushing down something that was second nature. As if he meant to do something that he’d always done. 

You swallowed hard enough to hear it in your ears. Looking at Bucky, you arched your brow in a subtle defiance—daring him to do what he intended. You wanted to know him and his habits, to understand even a modicum of what was in his brain. 

Without thinking a second more, he let his left arm lift a bit. He reached toward your face but paused at you flinching, leaning away from him. 

Just barely audible, you spoke, “Sorry.” 

Bucky blinked and furrowed his brows, unable to stop himself. He let his fingers wrap around your face, a single hand pressing just under your chin and at the top of your throat. Slightly wide eyed, you watched him watching you. Most of his hand rested on your cheek, his thumb pressing into the other side of your face. 

Despite no longer being the Winter Soldier, his habits lingered. When in that state he remembered being like this so vividly—a hand around someone’s throat and crushing the life out of them. He hissed at the thought, not at all intending for that with you. He craned your head, though, observing the quizzical look on your face. 

It didn’t make sense to him, the need to maintain this routine. But he did. Beyond the haze of what was once his signature way of taking life—he saw a new one. Bucky could envision his future so clearly, yet he couldn’t let himself have it. 

He went to drop his hand but stopped at the feeling of yours on his wrist. It was inexplicable. Glove or not, you craved the contact from him. 

The room stayed silent except for the slight creak of the floorboards beneath you. While Bucky stayed steady, you teetered on the balls of your feet—this moment feeling fleeting. 

He inched forward, watching your eyes fall closed. 

Your lips were right there, the ones he’d openly been ogling at for months. It was torture, but all he knew. He couldn't allow himself the satisfaction of the feeling. He wasn’t deserving. 

Instead, he latched onto your neck. Bucky kissed and nibbled there with an urgency you hadn’t expected—hell, you didn’t even think today would’ve progressed to this at all. 

The feeling of him on you was intoxicating, and it was so minuscule. His hands were all over you, and yours on him. Your breath came out ragged, “We shouldn’t.” 

“You’re right.” He paused on your neck briefly, directly in your ear now. “We shouldn’t.” 

“We’re friends.” You nodded, letting your hands trail up his back and into his hair. 

“Are we?”

You weren’t sure. It was complicated. You couldn’t let yourself think about that now and neither could he. 

He pushed you down onto the couch and stood above you, allowing you to finally look him over. He was casually in jeans and a t-shirt, the rest of his body entirely covered. The only skin that showed besides his face was just below at his neck. Around it lay his dog tags, which he was so adamant about wearing. The glint of them always caught your eye and alerted you of his presence. Even when he showed up silent, you’d see him and those damn tags. Just always out of your eyeline but in the room—that was who Bucky had always been. In his stoicism, he was still consistently there.

Watching Bucky undo his pants already had you eager for him, too. There was always something there for you, an intrigue simply at the way he carried himself. You stayed seated, leaning back a bit in an attempt to slide down your sweatpants. Both of you watched the other discarding the bottom half of their clothes with little thought, tossing them aside. 

He leaned, then, ruffling into his dark jacket’s interior. 

“I got it,” he mumbled, ripping into the condom wrapper with his teeth. He slid the latex over himself just before pushing the jacket off his back. 

He kneeled into the couch, the angle awkward but enough that he was able to slide into you like he wanted. It was tight—rough. You expected the burn but still sucked in a breath at it, the lack of prep. Bucky didn’t mean to make it this way but just wanted it to be over—the insatiable need to pump in and out of you. Only you.

Slowly and deliberately, he continued to kiss around your neck, collarbone, and ears. He snapped into you, purposely moving at a speed that allowed him to chase a high rather than savor the moment with you. He wanted to, truly…to acknowledge the way you looked up at him. It was his dream to let the sounds of you falling apart actually hit his ears and mean something, but he couldn’t. 

The couch creaked and rocked. You were now slightly bent into the back of the cushions, your chest moving up and down alongside Bucky’s. He pulled back, stabilizing himself behind you. The new angle allowed you to see his dog tags again, them hitting you with every movement into you. Without thinking, you grabbed them, hooking them under one of your fingers. 

He finally allowed himself some relief, his voice dragging out the moans he’d himself been holding in. “Fuck...” 

You watched him intently, pulling him closer by the chain on his neck. He shifted his angle a bit at that and watched your jaw drop open. Your brows furrowed, whines choking out of you at the new sensation. It made you let go of his tags, grasping at the fabric of his shirt. This made him pound into you faster—realizing a tether of intimacy was gone. 

He was subconsciously glad for that, happy that he could pinpoint and force that sweet look in your eyes away. There was no longer an adoration in your gaze but simply one of pleasure. This was for the best. He could appreciate you from a distance despite the line of friendship being crossed so carelessly now. 

“Shit,” you groaned out suddenly. “Buck-“ 

He hushed you softly, quelling the harsh sound in your throat. It only spurred him on, though, truly ruthless about this. He only slowed at the feeling of your fingers gliding over his face, pushing the stray piece of hair out of view. His pace stuttered, faltering as he really looked at you. 

A second later, he started in on you again. A clothed hand found its way into your shirt and pinched at your nipples. His grip was rough, kneading your chest. You were already so close; every additional sensation only pushed you further.

You met him suddenly, writhing into him and filling the living room with lewd slapping sounds. 

Bucky huffed breaths out at every push into you. You fought a squeak, pressing your own hand over your mouth. You gnawed at it as it allowed some relief from the burning inside of you. He was hitting that same spongey spot over and over. He was so good at picking up on the subtle changes in your face and body. 

Without warning he slipped out and nudged you, “Turn.” 

You did without questioning, a firm covered hand rubbing at the skin of your hips. Regardless of his gloves, you felt the difference in his hands—the slight shift of metal in one versus the pulse in the other. There was a contrast you enjoyed, a chill about his metal arm that grounded you. 

A knee pushed your legs open as he slid into you again, this time using you as leverage. Bucky pushed you down slowly, the side of your head finding the cushion. This angle was new, deeper. It wouldn’t be much longer at this point and he could tell. One hand slipped underneath you and up to your neck again, squeezing just enough for you to appreciate the loss of breath. In between gasps you nudged further into the couch, the sensation becoming too much for you. 

He couldn’t stop when you came, relishing the way your insides continued to pulse. It was as if he was meant to stay; his one true purpose was to be completely enveloped by you. When he finished a strained sound choked in his throat, one that you hadn’t expected. 

You were throbbing still, a cold feeling finally making you realize he pulled away. The feeling of him on you had gone away so quick. The sound of a different metal clanked—his belt buckle bouncing around as he slid his pants back on. 

“Should we…should I tell Steve about this?” 

Your question was sudden but was filled with a weight that scared him. You didn’t want to be too forward—but it was only right. Steve was now caught in the middle of something complicated. Even if this was the first and only time…you weren’t sure you could keep this from him. 

Bucky thought differently. 

“Why would you wanna tell Steve?” 

“Because it’s-“ 

“Leave him out of this.”  

Bucky readjusted his clothes, smoothing them over as they’d been before. You watched him inch his way to the door—his back toward you. 

You ignored the pang in your chest, the confusion that now resonated in you. Pushing it away, you settled on changing the subject. “Steve wanted to do something tomorrow, you coming?” 

He didn’t turn as he grabbed the doorknob, merely craned his head to the side. You watched his profile for any sense of something, but again, he was so unreadable for you. 

���I’ll be there.” 

Then he left. 

part two

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[count-on-mi]

Another normal day in dorm (Jeongyeon)

Due to a sudden illness, Jeongyeon’s body underwent a dramatic change—her weight skyrocketed, and her figure became unrecognizable. For an idol whose career depends on her appearance, this was a crushing blow.

Her once slender and graceful body became bloated and clumsy. The chubby woman staring back at her in the mirror felt like a complete stranger, filling Jeongyeon with shame and alienation. She avoided mirrors, refused to go out, and hid at home, wallowing in self-pity.

As a public figure, Jeongyeon dreaded fans discovering her transformation, terrified of their ridicule and rejection. Her agency worked tirelessly to conceal the issue, fearing it would tarnish the group’s image.

Under this dual pressure, Jeongyeon’s psyche began to warp. She became obsessed with perverse erotic novels, finding fleeting pleasure in their pages.

When night fell, Jeongyeon would sneak into public restrooms, locking herself in the innermost stall. Stripping off her clothes, she faced the grimy walls and began to masturbate.

Her mind was consumed by the wild plots of those stories: rape, domination, humiliation… The thought of these sent heat coursing through her body. She yearned to be ravaged, to be toyed with until her mind unraveled, like the heroines in her novels.

“Mmm… give me more… harder…” Jeongyeon moaned softly with her eyes closed, her fingers moving rapidly between her legs. She deliberately made louder noises, fantasizing about someone bursting in, stripping away her dignity and boundaries.

After what felt like an eternity, Jeongyeon reached climax. She collapsed to the floor, tears streaming down her face. This perverse pleasure left her feeling hollow and sorrowful, yet she was powerless to stop.

9:46 PM

While the other members of TWICE were preparing for their comeback, Jeongyeon was left alone in the dorm again. While watching erotic novels before going to bed, the power suddenly went out due to a faulty circuit breaker. With no other option, Jeongyeon called her manager for help. The manager and his assistant, who were out dining, promised to come over after hearing about the blackout.

The manager and assistant arrived soon and told Jeongyeon to wait while the assistant went to fetch tools and a new circuit breaker. As they waited, the manager struck up a conversation with Jeongyeon.

Soon, the assistant returned with the tools. In the dark dorm, the manager had Jeongyeon hold a flashlight while he worked on replacing the circuit breaker, with the assistant observing nearby.

At that moment, Jeongyeon noticed the manager and assistant staring at her with lecherous eyes. An inexplicable wave of desire surged within her, making it hard to control herself. Feeling overheated, she handed the flashlight to the assistant and stumbled into the bathroom in the dark. The manager continued working on the breaker, while the assistant smirked mischievously.

In the bathroom, Jeongyeon, overwhelmed by desire, even she had just masturbated crazy in a public toilet, clamped her thighs together, bent over the toilet lid, and supported herself with one hand while the other reached down, frantically rubbing her clitoris. She knew she shouldn’t be doing this, but her body’s intense reaction was uncontrollable.

“Why? Why this sudden, overwhelming lust? Why? I can’t take it anymore!” Jeongyeon thought as she pleasured herself, her hips facing the bathroom door. Suddenly, the lights came back on, and she felt a hand on her buttocks. Startled, she stopped but remained bent over, too nervous to look back.

The manager, caressing her round buttocks, said, “Jeongyeon, are you that lonely? Masturbating in the bathroom when there are men in the dorm? TWICE’s girls are so naughty.” The assistant, seeing Jeongyeon in such a compromising position, was stunned but quickly became aroused.

Blushing and too shy to turn around, but being horny at the same time, Jeongyeon whispered, “Oppa, you can’t do this… we’re colleagues.”

“Haha, it’s because we’re colleagues that we should help relieve your loneliness. We’re just being helpful!” the manager said shamelessly, reaching around to unhook her bra. Jeongyeon let out a reluctant “ah.”

The manager pulled down her pajama pants and underwear, leaving her in just her top, her pale, round buttocks fully exposed to the two men.

“So beautiful,” the manager muttered. Both men eagerly groped her soft, white buttocks, occasionally squeezing the flesh.

“Oppa, don’t… don’t bully me like this… it’s not right…” Jeongyeon squirmed slightly, as if trying to evade their hands, but to the two men, it seemed like she was enticing them further.

“Bro, her skin is so smooth, so soft. I wonder how it feels to fuck her,” the assistant said. Jeongyeon buried her face in the toilet lid, too ashamed to face them, but her position made it all too easy for them to molest her. The assistant slipped his hand under her top, roughly kneading her breasts, shaping them into various forms and tugging at her nipples. The manager knelt down, licking her vagina, which was already wet with arousal. His teasing made her labia glisten, her pink folds irresistibly tempting.

“Ah… mm… ah… you can’t… you can’t do this…” Jeongyeon moaned, her remaining shred of rationality making a final stand. The assistant, still groping her breasts, kissed her ears and lifted her shoulders to kiss her face. Jeongyeon’s face was flushed with desire, driving the assistant to kiss her neck, cheeks, and lips passionately. Jeongyeon, moaning, reciprocated, extending her tongue to meet his kisses.

The manager moved his tongue to the area between her anus and vagina, his fingers relentlessly stimulating her clitoris. He licked around her wet anus, probing it with his tongue.

“Ah… ah… don’t… don’t lick there…” Jeongyeon was incoherent, her mind already surrendering to the assault of the two men.

The manager, licking her anus, stood up and said, “, I’ll let you go first. I’ll play with her tits.” Feeling the absence of the manager’s tongue, Jeongyeon felt a strange sense of loss. The assistant dropped his pants, positioned himself behind her, and thrust his erect cock into her vagina.

“Ah… ah…” Jeongyeon felt a rush of fulfillment, accepting the assistant’s assault.

“So good, Jeongyeon. I’ve wanted to fuck you for so long but never had the chance. You’re always so glamorous on stage, I didn’t dare speak much. Turns out you’re such a slut, seducing us to rape you when the others aren’t around,” the assistant said as he thrust.

He watched his cock slide in and out of her vagina, stretching her opening wide, the visual stimulation intense. His cock glistened with her juices. Her pink vagina opened and closed with each thrust.

“Fuck… fuck my pussy… it feels so good… so big… I can’t take it… mm… ah… ah…” The manager sat on the toilet lid, Jeongyeon’s head resting between his legs. He lifted her face, urging her to suck him. With a trace of rationality left, Jeongyeon was overwhelmed by the sight of his cock. Under his coercion, she took half of it into her mouth. The manager enjoyed her blowjob, grabbing her breasts and teasing her nipples.

The assistant, holding her waist, began thrusting rapidly, continuing for about 20 minutes. Jeongyeon’s legs weakened, her body leaning heavily on the manager. His cock went deeper into her mouth, causing her to gag and choke from the intensity.

The assistant’s thighs slapped against her buttocks, reddening them with each impact. Choking on the manager’s cock and overwhelmed by the assistant’s thrusts, Jeongyeon struggled, but the assistant kept pounding her vagina. As he came, she collapsed to the floor, gasping for air.

The assistant, sweating from the exertion, felt exhilarated watching Jeongyeon collapse. The manager stood, lifted her, washed her face, and stripped off her remaining clothes, leaving her completely naked.

He sat her on the toilet lid, placed her legs on his shoulders, and thrust his thick cock into her vagina. The size caused her pain, and she grimaced, clutching his waist as he pounded her. He moved slowly, grinding against her, mixing her juices with the assistant’s semen, and rubbed her clitoris.

Jeongyeon moaned, “Ah… ah… it feels so good… Oppa, you’re fucking me so good…”

The manager said, “Hold her arms. I’ll show you something exciting.”

The assistant grabbed her arms, pulling them from the manager’s waist. The manager sped up, flipping her labia with each thrust. Jeongyeon, never having experienced such a large cock, screamed, “Ah… ah…” The assistant rapidly rubbed her clitoris, overwhelming her with pleasure.

“Ah… ah… Oppa, stop… you can’t fuck me like this… I’ll break… ah…” Jeongyeon trembled, unable to resist the two men. As the manager thrust and the assistant teased her clitoris, she suddenly urinated, spraying onto the manager. Shocked but thrilled, he realized he had reduced a beloved idol to such a state.

Jeongyeon arched her back, screaming, “Ah… ah… don’t…” before climaxing. Her body was covered in urine, sweat, and juices, experiencing unprecedented stimulation.

Exhausted, her arms hung limply as the manager continued fucking her vagina. The assistant placed his cock at her mouth, and she obediently opened it, letting him thrust inside.

In TWICE’s dorm, the manager and assistant took turns—one fucking her vagina, the other her mouth. The assistant deliberately thrust deeply, aroused by her submissive demeanor.

Five minutes later, the assistant shoved his cock fully into her mouth, causing her to struggle and gag, tears and snot streaming down her face. The manager kept pounding her vagina, pulling out and thrusting back in, making her body tremble. Seeing her pained yet aroused expression, the assistant came in her throat.

After cumming, the assistant felt no fatigue, still stroking her body. The manager continued raping her for another half hour before shooting his load deep inside her.

In over an hour, both men had cummed in her mouth and vagina. Exhausted, Jeongyeon sat limply on the toilet, semen dripping from her vagina, too ashamed to look at them.

The manager, crouching to admire her dripping vagina, said excitedly, “Good thing I was prepared and captured this moment.” A camera on the counter had recorded everything.

The assistant, playing with her vagina, said, “Jeongyeon, want more? We’ve helped you relieve your urges.”

Jeongyeon, head bowed, said nothing, her breasts heaving. The assistant’s fingers teased her vagina, slipping inside.

“…Mm…” Jeongyeon moaned instinctively.

The assistant kissed her, speeding up his fingers. Under his teasing, she moaned erotically again.

“…Ah… ah… no more, Oppa… I’m exhausted… ah… mm… ah…” After a few minutes, she climaxed again, urinating high into the air, to the manager’s delight.

3:30 AM

Jeongyeon lay on the bed’s edge, the manager holding her legs, thrusting steadily into her vagina. She was giving the assistant a blowjob, her head hanging off the bed, aligning her throat for deep penetration. The assistant’s cock went fully inside, his pubic hair covering her face, her throat bulging as she swallowed.

Her deep throating pleased the assistant. After a few seconds, he pulled out.

“Cough… cough…” Jeongyeon choked, grabbing his cock to stop him, saying seductively, “Oppa, you’ll kill me!”

The assistant chuckled, groping her breasts, saying, “How could I? I love you too much! Who else would we play with? Come on, keep going.” He thrust back into her mouth.

Jeongyeon obediently continued. After a night of relentless assault, the men’s rhythm was perfect. Soon, her body writhed, gripping the sheets, legs alternating between closing and spreading, toes curling, breathing heavily.

The men exchanged a knowing smile and sped up. Seconds later, Jeongyeon trembled violently, legs clamping around the manager’s waist, her body arching in a sensual curve.

After two minutes of climax, she relaxed. The men stepped back, their erect cocks twitching. Jeongyeon lay smiling, her limbs twitching slightly.

Ten minutes later, she slowly got up. The assistant hugged her from behind, asking, “How was it? Good?”

Leaning weakly against him, she brushed her hair aside and shyly said, “Damn Oppa… you’ll kill me eventually.”

The manager pinched her chin, saying, “Slut, we haven’t even cum yet. What now?”

Jeongyeon glanced at him, her voice dripping with seduction, “Then let this little slut serve you well!” She stood and kissed the manager passionately.

“Bro, mind if I go first?” the assistant asked.

“Go ahead. She almost sucked me dry earlier,” the manager replied. The assistant kissed Jeongyeon, thrusting into her vagina and pumping away.

Watching them, the manager hugged her from behind, saying, “I’ll take the back door, slut.”

“Mm… mmm…” Jeongyeon, lost in the kiss, mumbled in agreement. The manager spit on his hand, rubbed his softening cock, and pressed it against her anus, saying, “Here it comes,” before thrusting in.

“Mmm… mmm…” Jeongyeon moaned muffledly, her mouth occupied.

“So tight…” the manager gasped.

“Yeah, her front’s tight too. Still like a virgin after all this. She’s perfect!” the assistant said, pulling away from her mouth.

“Ah… Oppa… you bad guys… you’ve played with every part of me…” Jeongyeon panted, her voice intoxicatingly seductive.

“Idols are just different. So much better than regular sluts,” the manager said, groping her breast.

“Yeah… it’s like fucking a corpse with them…” the assistant said, thrusting hard.

“You… pervy Oppas…” Jeongyeon gasped.

Sandwiched between them, she moaned, “Oppa… faster… I’m coming… so good… you’re killing me… ah…” She trembled violently, climaxing again.

The men didn’t stop, continuing to fondle her breasts and body while fucking her vagina and anus in sync.

The wet sounds grew louder. Jeongyeon trembled again, clearly thrilled by the prolonged assault, cooperating fully.

After about 15 minutes, with Jeongyeon climaxing again, she hugged the assistant tightly, unable to make a sound, her hands gripping his back, knuckles white, feet arched, toes curled.

The men, reaching their limit, panted heavily, thrusting faster.

“Oh…” The manager roared, pressing against her buttocks, his scrotum contracting as he came in her anus.

“I’m cumming… ah…” The assistant hugged her tightly, thrusting deep, shooting his load into her vagina.

“You’re fucking me to death…” Jeongyeon screamed hysterically, her body tensing before going limp, fainting.

[anonymousewrites]

Lavender for Royalty; Sage for Wisdom

Kyoya Ootori x Reader

Chapter Nine: Heliotrope for Devotion

Summary: While the Host Club argues about the events at the beach, Kyoya decides to try to teach a lesson.

            “I can’t believe Tamaki said that,” said Haruhi, still fuming as she and (Y/N) went to the basement. The lights had gone out due to the storm, so they needed to flip up the circuit breaker. “What does being a girl have to do with anything?”

            “Even if we got into a bit of trouble, it was the right thing to do,” agreed (Y/N). “We can’t just run away when men act like that. It lets them get away with it again.”

            “Are you sure you’re okay, though, senpai?” said Haruhi. “You hit the water pretty hard.”

            (Y/N) smiled. “Yes, I’m fine.”

            Haruhi breathed out a sigh of relief. “I don’t think Tamaki is right, but I would have felt pretty bad if you’d gotten hurt,” she admitted.

            “You wouldn’t have to,” said (Y/N). “It was my decision to fight them like I did. If I hadn’t landed the hits I did, they wouldn’t have thrown me over the cliff.” (Y/N) walked to the circuit breaker and flipped it. The lights flickered back on, and (Y/N) smiled at Haruhi. “And I don’t regret hitting them. It was extremely satisfying.” They grinned wider. “The only thing I regret is not breaking that guy’s arm when I had the chance. I had the right leverage, just a little more force…” They brightened. “Oh, well. It wouldn’t have been the best for my reputation, I suppose.”

            “Senpai…You’re a little scary.” Haruhi sweat-dropped.

            (Y/N) chuckled. “Let’s get to dinner.”

            Haruhi nodded, and they walked back up the stairs together.

            “By the way, how did you end up in a sundress?” said (Y/N). “Did Tamaki put that in your room?”

            “My dad,” said Haruhi, deadpanning. “He replaced all my changes of clothes.”

            (Y/N) chuckled. “That sounds like your dad. You can borrow some of my clothes if you don’t feel comfortable.” They had simple loose trousers and some simple collared shirts—put-together enough as a host but relaxed enough to just hang with their friends.

            “I don’t mind dresses,” said Haruhi, shrugging. She glanced at (Y/N) as they walked. “Do you…?”

            “Mind dresses?” (Y/N) waved a hand. “Don’t worry. I don’t mind answering questions.” They shrugged. “I don’t mind dresses. I wear a lot of masc clothing during school, but I occasionally wear some fem clothing when off campus.”

            Haruhi nodded in understanding and pushed open the door of the dining room where the other hosts and Nekozawa were playing some strange game (really, the hosts were playing, and Nekozawa was “terrorizing” Tamaki). Tamaki and Nekozawa were screaming as the lights flickered on, and Haruhi rolled her eyes.

            “The circuit breaker was down,” said Haruhi. “We found it in the basement and flicked it up.”

            “No ghosts,” said (Y/N).

            “…Haruhi, are those clothes yours?” said Hikaru, surprised.

            “Yeah. My dad repacked my bag,” said Haruhi. “Not very practical, but it’s what I had.”

            Good job Haruhi’s dad! thought the twins and Honey (and Tamaki, secretly, but he was still frustrated with Haruhi).

            “Haruhi, you’re so cute!” said Honey.

            “Where’d Nekozawa go?” said (Y/N), looking around. The host of the Host Club had disappeared.

            “He wanted to turn in early,” said Kyoya, not looking up from his notebook. (Y/N) frowned as their heart clenched at his lack of acknowledgement of them. “The electricity was a shock to him.”

            “(Y/N), Haru, we have fancy tuna!” said Honey, gesturing the table.

            They sat down, and Haruhi was about to reach for the fancy tuna, but, childishly, Tamaki grabbed it and stuffed it into his mouth (he wanted Tamaki’s attention but wasn’t willing to speak to her). Everyone deadpanned, and (Y/N)’s eyebrow twitched.

            “There’s…um…crab, too!” said Honey hurriedly.

            “I’ll have that,” said Haruhi, picking it up and cracking it open.

            (Y/N), wisely staying out of the situation, reached out to eat some oyster spaghetti instead of crab.

            “Crab, Tamaki? Here.” Haruhi held out a leg.

            Everyone stared. She was talking to him? Tamaki’s eyes widened, and he took it. He deadpanned.

            “It’s just the shell,” said Haruhi, monotone.

            Payback for the tuna… thought everyone.

            In retaliation, Tamaki reached for some crab, but Haruhi stabbed the table with her knife, blocking his path.

            “Haruhi can be…childish, apparently,” said Kaoru.

            Kyoya hummed slightly in acknowledgement, but as he looked up, his eyes only went to (Y/N) where they ate calmly. They didn’t seem shaken or thinking at all about what they had done in the afternoon, the danger they’d been in.

            “Who do you think you are, the twins?!” said Tamaki, glaring at Haruhi.

            “I thought you weren’t talking to me?” said Haruhi, rolling her eyes.

            A giant irk mark appeared on Tamaki’s forehead “So you have no intention of reconsidering. Fine, then! I’m going to bed!” He walked to the door, and a servant bowed.

            “I will show you to your room. This way,” said the servant.

            Tamaki peered down the dark, spooky corridor. “Um…Kyoya…?” He pouted. “Aren’t you ready for bed?”

            Kyoya sighed and stood. “I’ll turn in early, too.”

            He and Tamaki headed out, and (Y/N)’s eyes remained on the door as it swung closed. They hesitated before standing. “I’m going to head to bed, too.” They smiled. “Goodnight, everyone.”

            “’Night!” said Honey.

            “I’ll see you in the morning,” said Haruhi, nodding.

            (Y/N) headed to the door and stepped out. They turned down the hall and walked in the direction of their and the rest of the hosts’ rooms. They were tired, yes, but they had business to attend to before dinner. Tamaki and Haruhi fighting was disrupting the peace, and they needed to get them to talk things out and explain they were both right and wrong—Haruhi and (Y/N) had gotten into some trouble, but they had done the right thing, and Tamaki had been right to be a bit worried, but he had been wrong to get angry instead of expressing his concern in a healthy manner.

            And so, (Y/N) was going to talk to Kyoya. He knew Tamaki well, (Y/N) knew Haruhi well, and together they could get them to talk. (Sure, Kyoya preferred not to get involved in these things, but (Y/N) knew he would want the Host Club to remain cordial and working well).

            They arrived at his door and knocked. “Kyoya?” The door opened at their simple knock, not completely closed. Awkwardly, (Y/N) stepped in and looked around. “Kyoya?” A gust of wind blew the door closed, (Y/N) jumped. The shutters banged as the winds of the storm picked up, and (Y/N) huffed. They walked over and pulled the window closed properly.

            “(Y/N)?”

            (Y/N) turned, and their face could’ve been painted red. Kyoya stood in the doorway of the bathroom, shirtless with pajama pants hanging loosely around his hips. Quickly, they bowed apologetically. “I’m so sorry, the door was opened, I didn’t realize you were showering—”

            “It’s fine,” said Kyoya, running a hand through his damp hair. Without his glasses on, his dark eyes were more piercing than usual, and as his gaze landed on (Y/N), they found themself rooted in place. “I wanted to speak to you.”

            “You did?” (Y/N) had thought he was frustrated or something since he hadn’t spoken, but if he wanted to talk, that was good, right?

            ��Yes. You and Haruhi caused quite some trouble for us,” said Kyoya. He walked towards (Y/N). “Tamaki told me the twins nearly tried to kill those boys. We had to send flowers worth several thousand dollars to our guests.”

            (Y/N) winced. That was trouble.

            “But there is an easy solution.”

            Kyoya stood in front of (Y/N), and as they took a step back—oh my god, he’s so close, spiraled their thoughts—their legs hit the bed. Kyoya caught them as they teetered back, and he lowered them to the bed. (Y/N)’s eyes widened as he leaned over them, his legs between theirs, one hand at their waist as their shirt rode up to expose skin, and the other above their head. Instinctively, (Y/N)’s hands went to his shoulders, unsure of what was about to happen. This was very forward of Kyoya, and their heart thumped quickly in their chest.

            “You can pay me back with your body,” said Kyoya, his breath ghosting over their ear. “After all…I’m a man. You’re attractive and weaker than me. It would be quite easy for me to take advantage of that.”

            And then all of (Y/N)’s surprise, nervousness, and tiny amount of fear left them. They smiled and laughed. Kyoya’s eyes widened slightly at the reaction, and (Y/N) lifted a hand to his cheek.

            Kyoya’s heart thumped suddenly in his chest at the touch and the softness in their gaze as they looked up at him. Suddenly, although he had intentionally placed himself in such a situation, Kyoya was acutely aware of the feeling of their legs almost wrapped around his hips and his hand on the skin of their waist. He sat back, heart still pounding, and (Y/N) sat up.

            “You were trying to teach me a lesson, weren’t you?” said (Y/N) gently. They chuckled and shook their head. “You certainly do things in a unique way.”

            “You were in danger,” said Kyoya. “You didn’t even think; you immediately put yourself in harm’s way.” His dark gaze pierced (Y/N)’s once more. “Do you understand what it felt—what is was like to see you falling from the cliff? If you had hit a rock, you would be dead. Or if those boys had done something to you—”

            “I know,” said (Y/N), reaching out and touching Kyoya’s arm boldly. “I know I should’ve thought more. Haruhi and I should’ve hit them and run with the girls. But we gave the guests a chance to leave, first. We’d rather be in danger than them.” They smiled gently and squeezed his arm slightly. “And I can’t regret protecting people. Do you understand, Kyoya? I don’t regret it. I understood the danger. I know what men are capable of. But…thank you for worrying.”

            “How did you know?” said Kyoya, looking at them. “How did you know I wasn’t capable of that?” He needed them to understand there was always danger. He didn’t want them to trust the wrong person and get hurt. He didn’t want them hurt.

            “Kyoya, you wouldn’t take advantage of someone,” said (Y/N) simply. “That’s not who you are.” They smiled at him. “I could never fear you.”

            Kyoya stared at them, and that sudden twisting in his heart lit up into a fire. Oh. He had never felt this feeling, but he recognized it immediately. He knew it from the way he watched the moonlight slant across their face—the one that was so handsome. He knew it from the way he enjoyed the softness in their gaze. He knew it from the way he listened so eagerly to their honesty and trust. Kyoya liked (Y/N). He had feelings for them.

            Kyoya smiled slightly and chuckled as the feeling welled up in his heart. “That’s not who I am? I’m sure many would disagree.”

            “You’re strategic, sure,” said (Y/N). “You’re the Shadow King of the Host Club. But you’re not a cruel man. Not in that way. Not ever. I trust you.”

            “What an interesting notion…” said Kyoya softly, gazing at them. His hand raised to cover theirs on his arm. “You have a strange perspective of me.”

            “I’m your friend. I see you for who you are,” said (Y/N), smiling.

            Kyoya’s newfound feelings burned more ferociously within his heart as he heard their words. “I…apologize for attempting to frighten you. It was wrong of me.”

            “It was,” said (Y/N). “But I don’t mind. I’m alright.” In fact, it was kind of nice… They had to quickly shake that thought away. They dropped their hand from his arm and stood. “I’ll leave you now. I just wanted to say that Haruhi and Tamaki need to talk.”

            “Tamaki already plans to speak to Haruhi,” said Kyoya.

            “Good,” said (Y/N). They smiled. “Well…goodnight, Kyoya.”

            “Goodnight, (Y/N).” He watched them head to the door and hesitated. “(Y/N).”

            They looked back at him. “Yes, Kyoya?”

            “I’m glad you’re alright. I don’t enjoy seeing you in danger,” said Kyoya. He was quite pleased as (Y/N) smiled wider.

            “I know,” said (Y/N). “Thank you for saving me.”

            Kyoya nodded and watched them leave. As the door swung closed, he spoke softly. “I always will.”

Taglist:

@roo024

@jmclouds

@yappydoo

@ramblingsoftheill

@girgal73

@rockerica

@nosoyyo1213

@ritzes28

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[haberiler]

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[scarlettohairdye]

Home Ownership Was a Mistake

This is for @trickybonmot, who may or may not use some of these stories in a fic.

Okay. So.

In the year of our lord 2010, my wife and I were lucky enough to be gifted $20k by my parents, which in those days (given it was a historically low point for real estate prices in Seattle) was enough for a down payment on a house. It was an astounding confluence of luck and privilege that led to us being homeowners, because if they gave us the same money now it would go precisely nowhere.

Anyway, it was not enough money for a large house, or a fancy house. We looked at a lot of places, only some of which were move-in ready (and one of which was absolutely just a tear-down) and eventually settled on our current place, which is a 1910 bungalow with a detached garage that was finished and turned into a studio.

Was it the most aesthetically pleasing house when we bought it? No. The walls were white, the carpet was light beige, and the paint had seen better days. That said, it was move-in ready and the owner was pretty desperate to sell, so we took it!

The inspector let us know that some of the wiring was still the old knob-and-tube, so we'd want that updated sooner rather than later, but it looked pretty good. About half the outlets were grounded, so it didn't stop us from plugging in three-prong appliances. We just had to use more extension cords than maybe we'd prefer.

The Electrical

The first big house thing we paid for was to have the entire place rewired. Our circuit breaker was a mystery, we didn't have enough outlets, and we were tired of being stuck with specific layouts of our stuff due to the lack of grounded outlets. We were expecting about half the wiring to be up to code, and the rest would need an update.

Spoiler alert: HAHAHAHAHAHA.

The rewiring took about a week, and every morning the electrician sat down with us and told us what new fire trap he'd uncovered.

"Yeah, so the knob and tube wiring going to the lights in the ceiling? Knob and tube gets hot when it's running, and yours is under three layers of insulation."

"You know how you thought your outlets were grounded? They weren't, actually, the ground wire just went elsewhere into the house and wasn't connected to anything."

"So there's wiring in your crawlspace? Whoever put that in nailed some sheets of wood paneling over it, so we had to rip the wood paneling out to access it."

I think the job was about $15k when it was done, we had many many more outlets, and our house was no longer one bad day from lighting itself on fire. Victory, I guess?

The Studio Window

This was leaking a bit, and we knew it was leaking when we moved in. (South facing walls get all the weather in our region.) We were not handy enough to replace it ourselves at the time and we also didn't have money because I got laid off shortly after we bought the house and was making my living doing costume commissions. Solution: Trade costuming work to an acquaintance who did carpentry.

The window, we discovered, was not so much a finished window as it was a single sheet of glass sandwiched between some boards.

Badly.

The carpenter was not entirely she that she was qualified for the job, but she did manage to remove the single sheet of glass and replace it with a window that was insulated and actually capable of opening. She used caulk around it. It was way better than we had before. Maybe someday we'll have both studio windows replaced by a contractor who actually does windows, but this is not that day!

The Siding

The cedar shingles were no longer cutting it at a certain point, so we had the house resided. (Houses are money pits, in case you didn't know.) This was a $30k job (MONEY PIT!) and had several layers of badness.

Bad: Our house had no insulation. It was cedar shingles over the original siding, with nothing in between that original siding and our INTERIOR WALLS. There was occasionally a newspaper. Our PM asked if we wanted insulation? And we said yes, please!!! We did not have a lot of time to think about insulation or research the best type, so it's just sheets of the pink fiberglass stuff in there, but it exists and we have it now!

Worse: Underneath our laundry room was a horrorshow. The laundry room is an addition that was added to our house probably sometime in the 50s? And, uh...

Well, the siding guys pulled off the siding, took a look at what was under it, and immediately called the project manager. The project manager came out, took a look, and then called us. He said that the siding guys thought it really needed to be reinforced and stabilized before they re-sided it, which is very fair, because I think the people who built it originally were drunk when they did it. It was a fucking Wild West cowboy construction situation under there.

Yes, you heard that right: A LOAD-BEARING SHINGLE.

Our project manager also informed us that the siding guys couldn't do the reinforcement, because they're just siding guys. They don't do structural. This is very fair.

It also needed to be done by Monday so we could stay on schedule for the siding work.

We learned this on Friday.

I immediately called my general contractor dad and got his voicemail, because (I remembered belatedly) he was in Mexico getting dental surgery. There was absolutely no way we could get another contractor out to do the work over a single weekend.

It was up to us.

My wife and I (mostly my wife) went HAM on it. We rented big jacks from the tool library to prop the laundry room up while we replaced one of the entirely rotten support poles. One of the big telephone poles was so wrecked with dry rot we could kick it out of place. (It didn't even touch the BIG ROCK that was supposed to be its foundation!!! It was floating!!!) Several of the joists were also fucked, so we ran new joists alongside them and married them together. My wife dug holes while crouched in a 4' high space, filled the holes with gravel, compacted it by putting a piece of wood on top of it and hitting it with a mallet, and then installed an entire additional support system from 4x4s and deck blocks. She actually attached the support system TO THE FUCKING HOUSE, which was a big improvement from the way it was originally held on by vibes and paint.

Here's a tasty little before and after:

(Yeah, see how that visible joist at the front just... stops at the far left? There's a new joist right behind it now.)

This was completed with resounding cries of, "Good enough!" and "It's better than it was before!" The siding guys thought it was fine and sided over it. Someday hopefully we will be able to afford to tear the whole thing down and rebuild it with a properly poured foundation, but in the meantime the spin cycle on the washing machine no longer shakes the whole house. Victory?!

Ridiculous: The purple paint saga. My wife and I are lesbians who tend toward maximalism in our decoration style. Construction companies find this baffling. We paid extra to our siding company to get the extended color choices (if you order the siding with the color baked in it lasts longer, but you're limited to a particular range of colors) and spoiler alert: 90% of them are boring as fuck. We basically paid extra to have access to 400 shades of white and 400 more shades of beige. There were like three saturated colors in the whole book. Pathetic.

Anyway, we chose the one nice teal that was available and decided we'd paint the door purple, since all the purple colors were gray at best. The project manager then forgot to put in our order, and when he remembered he'd forgotten, ordering our siding through his company would have pushed back the start time by six weeks. We could still make the original start time if we ordered through a different company doing the same thing, though!

Me, immediately: And we wouldn't be restricted to your color palette, right? Him: Yeah, they can do custom colors. Me, slapping down a color card called "Fully Purple": MAKE IT PURPLE.

Bless this man, he went to the siding company and asked for Fully Purple. They told him they couldn't do that color, and also is he sure anyone wants this color? He called them on the phone and informed them yes, we did want that color, and also that he'd worked for them and he knew damn well they could do that color, they'd just have to custom mix it, so they needed to do their fucking jobs. Suitably chastened, they finally sent us a sample of the siding, and it was... okay. It was purple for sure, but a little de-saturated. Not the purple of our hearts.

I asked if they'd actually started manufacturing our siding yet or just sent the color sample. The project manager confirmed they hadn't, and if we ordered this imperfectly-purple siding now, it would be several weeks before we could get started.

"We're gonna paint," I decided, and our project manager put in the orders.

The paint store called him and said, "Hey, are you sure you want this color?" Yes, he assured them, that's the right color.

The guys doing the painting opened up the can and then called him and said, "Are you sure this color?" and he told them yes! They want that color!

At this point I told him he should just start responding with, "They're lesbians!!! Yes! They want the purple! They're lesbians!!!"

Eventually we cleared every hurdle god and the construction industry put in front of us, and now our house is Fully Purple.

It also has insulation, wiring that won't kill us, and a laundry room that hopefully won't collapse anytime soon. We got a heat pump installed that took shockingly little time and worked immediately, and our next project will be having the roof redone. Check back in to find out what fresh horror awaits us then! I think it'll be a second roof under our existing roof made of lead and asbestos tiles, probably!